Loneliness is a powerful personal dilemma that is quite pervasive in the world today, particularly in contemporary society. It is an experience where one feels estranged, separated or cut off from the rhythm of life.
At first glance, it could be said that at the core of loneliness is a reality of being physically alone; and that if one surrounds his or her self with caring people – problem will be solved. This has been tried oftimes with varying degrees of success – but, the results are genuinely short lived. It may help to be around positive people, but usually there’s more that needs to be understood and done.
Loneliness is an internal matter, and should be addressed and handled from the inside out for the effects to be long lasting, and far reaching. The real core issue here, is a matter of “internal disconnection” – of one not being connected to the flow and rhythm of life.
Such disconnects are common, and usually occur from traumatic events which can be experienced in all ages and stages of life resulting from loss, fear, pain and grief.
The “internal disconnection” response to trauma can be either immediate or delayed. Practitioners of shamanic medicine believe the trauma causes a “fragmentation” or a breaking away of an essential part of the persona (soul loss).
Persons experiencing this process carry a certain woundedness about them that may not always be visible on the outside – but, within they have become less than their true selves – living only within the shadows and the margins of life, adapting and settling for far less than what they are entitled to… and capable of.
To truly heal, one must:
- Become aware of their state, and seek help
- Embrace and release the traumatic act which caused the separation (send it on its way)
- Find and re-integrate the lost wounded self
- Forgive all parties in the trauma, including yourself
- Restore happiness and love of self – this alone is your responsibility
Remember that time and commitment are key factors, and that a successful outcome is depended upon the quality put into the healing process. In addition, while it is possible for one to “self heal”, it is advisable to seek to aid of a qualified professional to assist you on the road to recovery.